Golden Years
by Strange.Laughter
Summary: This is the story of Emma Campion, read as she competes illegally in a tournament meant for noble men, as she falls for a man she cannot have, as she greets death like an old friend. William Thatcher/OC William Thatcher/Jocelyn I did not know Jocelyn's last name so I used a Royal medieval last name as hers. Enjoy!
1. Prologue - IMPORTANT

**Prologue**

**This is a story I wrote and nearly finished a long while ago, the end chapter was a small wisp of an idea that I had a long while ago. The original idea faded so I wrote that instead. ****I've done the best I could to make it better and I believe that it is. I don't mind if you don't like it, just keep any negative words to yourself, that's all I ask. ****Please, Enjoy.**

**"When you look for a man- what you want to look for is a man with the heart of a poor boy and the mind of a conqueror."  
― C. JoyBell C.**

My name is Emma Campion I live in…Well I live in many places, I was born into royalty in London and put into the Cheapside when I was 8 years old with merely a locket necklace with a painting of my family in it and their names as well as my own on the back, it is oval shaped and it has simple vines twisting around it with an emerald gem in the middle, I was found a few hours later by the Campion family and they took me in, I dropped my real last name and took theirs. The thing is that my real family is Royal and I am of royal birth and the Campion family know that but they won't tell anyone because I don't want them to, my sister is Jocelyn Lovell she and I are fraternal twins and look a lot alike but I look more like our father as my adoptive father, Gareth, told me, and she looks more like our mother.

I started travelling when I was 16 years old and my older brother Saul came with me, two years after that I joined the tournaments that included Jousting, sword fighting, archery and many other things; I was, and still am, quite fond of sword fighting and archery and I had always wanted to learn Jousting, my brother taught me jousting and I cut my hair, strapped down my bosom, found myself a Herald and entered the Tournament, with a few modifications to my facial features with make-up and a bit of dirt here and there I looked rough enough to look like a male and I lowered my voice a bit, plus I always had a thin scarf around my mouth and nose to help with the look, I have been pulling it off for a year now.

Just after I entered the tournament I found a blacksmith who joined me and made me personalized armor, I also found another squire. Saul my brother and first squire, Adelaide Coppin my blacksmith, Gerald Coppin Adelaide's brother and my second squire, and Wulfric Brian my Herald; we all became the best of friends and we were never apart when I was not in the tournament. Well I guess this is where we start, this is my story.


	2. Chapter 1

**Chapter 1 - Of Greetings, Tournament and Questions**

**Disclaimer - I do not own A Knights Tale, I only own the characters I created.**

My second year in the tournament started this year; last year I nearly won only to be beaten by Count Adhemar, I ended up in second place in my eyes but in his I was crushed to a pulp. This year I started the tournament in Rouen, but I did not joust for a change, instead I decided that I would watch the joust and see how good my opponents were from the start.

"Sign me up for Archery and Sword fighting please Wulfric" I asked my herald lowering my voice and looking down at him from my perch on my horse "why not the Joust my lord?" he asked "because I wish to see how good my opponents are first Wulfric, now please sign me up" I say lowering my voice a little more "yes sire" he said bowing and walking to the stand, I sigh "my sister should be here" I tell Adelaide in a hushed voice "that is what I heard" she replied patting the horse I was sitting on "are you going to try to say hello?" Saul asked "no I am not Saul, she must say hello to me first" I say watching Wulfric on the stand.

Minutes later I was riding Chancy, my horse, through the crowds when my ears heard a man singing, I veered Chancy toward him and saw that he was also on top of a horse, he stopped his horse and his song and I leaned to see what he was looking at, a woman in a white dress and a funny hat was in his direct line of attention _My sister_ I realized _she really grew didn't she, I know it's her though, she has the same facial features, but they are more defined and womanly_ I chuckled _she always was a looker, catching the attention of every man she crossed paths with_ I smirked as the man followed her and turned around heading to where I left everyone.

"You have a strange look on your face, what happened?" Gerald my other squire asked "I saw my sister" I say bluntly "really?" Wulfric asks I nod still looking at the horizon line "is she as good looking as before?" he asks I glare down at him "yes, yes she is" I grumble "as beautiful as ever" I chuckle frowning "and she walks as though she is at the top of the world too" I say sighing "primped, pampered and spoilt" I shake my head and turn my horse "always getting what she wants, not what she needs and getting it for free without any work done to get it" I snapped the reins of my horse and lightly kicked his sides with my heels, she lifted up on her hind legs and took off quickly down the road and towards the stadium where the tournament was being held.

Archery was first and I took all my anger out on hitting the target while playing an upbeat tune in my head and tapping my foot along with the beat, all in all I got all the directed arrows to hit the middle of my targets; Next was the moving targets, I hit them also every last one of them even the hardest; Then was the distance, my length was the top of the hay stack at the very end just before 1200 feet, right before where it cannot go any further.

The Next event was the Joust, I attended of course. There was a newbie jousting today by the name of Sir Ulrich von Liechtenstein, and was he good? Yes he was, he was very good, won every single one of them up until the break when the Swords competition was. I walked over to my group and nodded toward the sword event area without stopping my stride before taking lead and walking toward it myself. Minutes later I was in my armor and had a sword in hand while Adelaide tightened the armor "thank you Adelaide that is enough" I said lowering my sword arm, she stopped and said good luck as I walked up to the square where my opponent was standing as Wulfric introduced me "And here he is…Sir Emmery Lovell" Wulfric roared as I stepped into the square, I looked to the stands and saw my sister with her jaw hanging open looking at me in shock, I smirked and put my helmet on before rolling my shoulders and turning to my opponent.

A long while later I was paired up with the newbie as a finalist sword fighter, _I'll give the newbie credit, he's got this far_ I thought as we circle one another, he takes a swing and I block it he takes another and I block it again, and again and again, this goes on for a while with each of us only getting one or two hits in between _ this is the longest sword fight I've had yet _ I think smiling at the man I take a swing and he blocks the he takes and swing and fakes a left and instead hits right, he hits my side and I wince but don't back off instead I take a large cutting swing at him and he x's our swords by blocking, he slips his sword under me and knocks my feet out from underneath me "Damn it" I curse as the sword falls out of my hand when I land on my back, I sigh and stand up as his herald makes a finial speech "Yes, behold my lord Ulrich, the rock, the hard place, like a wind from Guilderland he sweeps by blown far from his homeland in search of glory and honor, we walk... in the garden... of his turbulence!" He yells, there is a bated silence where nothing is heard except and shuffle of feet _well, that was overdone_ I chuckle deeply and smirk as one of Ulrich's squires starts the applause and cheers, I clap loudly myself and go to congratulate him but his herald and squires lead him out of the square first _darn, I guess I give him congrats later then_ I think taking my helmet off and shaking my rather short curly-ish brown hair out of its helmet shape and into a more messy look "let us get going my liege" Adelaide coxes putting her hand on my shoulder as I stare into the crowd "yes let us go, I must see the turn outs of the joust tomorrow" I say turning and walking out of the square and to my tent.

As it turns out the newbie almost wins but failed to defeat Adhemar, whom I failed to defeat last year, Adhemar wins the joust. I line up with the other knights claiming their trophies, I receive the win for archery, an arrow in a target, small but worth a sufficient amount of money; Ulrich gets Sword and Adhemar gets the joust like I had suspected. I go to say my congrats but he walks swiftly out of the arena faster than I can say my own name _I'll find his tent then_ I decide, shaking my head I head to my own tent "here" I toss Gerald my trophy "get what you can with it" I continue walking to the tent. I look at the dress Adelaide laid out on my bed and sigh "Adelaide?" I call "yes Emma?" she asks "you expect me to go to the banquet as a woman?" I ask her "yes, I want you to show yourself in all your glory" she says smiling at me "thank you Adelaide, help me get it on when I get back" I say "I must speak with Ulrich, I didn't get a chance to congratulate him yet, he walked away before I could"

I put my scarf that covers my mouth and nose and walk out of the tent in my padding, riding hacks and my leather gloves, my breasts still wrapped tightly with cloth so they do not show with the loose clothing on. Once I reach his tent I hear him talking to his group, they address him as William as I listen "look William, you must be more careful, you are not of noble birth" my eyes widen at that comment "and you must act as though you are when you are at that banquet" I hear him scoff "I know Roland, I will. I'll be very careful too, especially around Jocelyn" he says _of course he is escorting Jocelyn; he did follow her this morning_ I silently chuckle and back away from the tent _I know his secret, it is as bad as mine too. Should I tell him that I know and tell him my own or should I just keep it a secret?_ I question myself while pacing back and forth beside the neighboring tent _I'll tell him_ I decide sighing and walking into his tent.

I see him bent over a table as I enter "pardon me, Sir Ulrich. I just wanted to congratulate you on your win" I say nodding to his group "thank you" he says looking up at one of his squires "Sir Lovell" the squire whisper-yells "yes, thank you Sir Lovell, now is there anything else you wanted?" he asks I smirk underneath my scarf "yes there is actually" I say "well?" his herald asks for 'William' "I just wanted to say that you should speak quieter on these grounds Sir Ulrich, or should I say William" I say, the group gasps "yes I heard, I did not mean to overhear though, I was coming to say congrats for the win and to say that you are an excellent swordsman and brilliant at the joust" I say chuckling slightly as he straightens up but doesn't face me "are you going to report me now Sir Lovell?" he asks quietly "oh no William, I am not for I am doing something similar but much, much worse" I say reaching up to grasp the edge of my scarf "what is that Lovell?" he asks chuckling at me, I smile and take the cloth off my face and I ruffle my hair, there are more gasps "you may call me Emma" I say in my regular voice, William turns around and looks at me "you're a girl?" he asks looking at me like I'm crazy "yes I am Will, and you are a mere peasant. But at least I am from noble birth, though I was raised as a peasant like yourself, in the Cheapside of London too" I smile wider at him and chuckle at the looks they are giving me "are you nuts?" the one with the red hair asks, I hold up my hand and separate the pointer finger and my thumb an inch and tilt my head forwards to the left while pursing my lips, they laugh "well, Emma, looks like you'll fit in nicely with us" the other says "thanks" I smile "are you going to attend the Banquet my lady?" the Herald asks "yes I am, as myself though not Sir Lovell, even if that is my real last name I go by Emma Campion now-a-days. Say a great big thank you to my parents for that one" I chuckle

"Do you have any sisters?" the red head asks "yes I do, one. Infact you have met her" I tell them "really?" the larger man asks "yes, it's Will's lady friend" I nod at him "you are joking?" Will blurts "no I am not Will" I say chuckling "why are you here then?" he asks "what pretending to be a man and a knight in a tournament?" I ask, there are various yes's "I was tossed to the Cheapside when I was 8, my parents only wanted one daughter and when they had me as well as Jocelyn…well let's say I got nothing while she got everything, they liked her better because she was born first and I was born 3 minutes after her. They kept me until I was 8 and then tossed me out with nothing but the clothes on my back and a locket" I say taking the locket out from under my shirt "the Campion family found me a little while after and took me into their family of five, making me the sixth of the Campion children but not by birth. I took their last name and grew up with three brothers and a father, my mother figure died about a year after she found me on the streets" I said looking at the locket with my mind in the past.

"Your past sucks" the red head said "yeah" I mumbled smoothing my thumb over the top of the locket and opening it inside I saw a picture of my family and myself in a small family painting I sigh and close the locket before putting it back under my shirt "so, you are going to the banquet?" the large one asks "yes, I thought I informed you of that already?" I ask "yes, you did I was just making sure" he says "well, I'm Geoffrey Chaucer" the herald says "this is Wat" he points to the red head "and this is Roland" he points to the large one "well you know me, I'd better be off, it takes a while to make myself look nice after a day like this" I say smiling at them and putting the scarf back on "how long have you been doing this?" Geoffrey asks "a year not including today, I left home when I was 16 though, two years before I changed my path" I say "and my gender" I laugh before walking out the door and to my own tent to put on my dress and the fake hair I need to keep from people getting suspicious.

When I walk into the Banquet most of the attendee's stop what they are doing to look at me most of the mutterings are "who is she?"s but I walk in smiling all the same. Soon they turned their attention away and I sat down at the table unknowingly across from William and Jocelyn, once I looked across from me I saw Will looking dreamily at Jocelyn, I chuckle sadly _She gets __**everything**_ I think shaking my head as the rest of the people take their seats around us. "You look wonderful my lady" I heard a man whisper in my ear "thank you sir" I say taking a bite of my food "not a problem, it is my job to complement fair maidens such as yourself, now where is your Maid I wonder, one such as yourself has to have one? Am I right?" he asks not letting me get a word in "I do not have a Maid sir and I do not intend to, now please let me eat in peace" I tell him taking another bite "my name is Count Adhemar, and you are" he asks ignoring what I said "that is none of your business Count, for I do not introduce myself to ignorant fools such as yourself" I comment while taking another bite of my food "is your name Venus? Aphrodite?" he asks kissing my hand, I jerk it back "please go away Adhemar, I have had enough of this" I tell him glaring straight up to his face "how dare you woman, don't you know where your place is?" he says affronted "yes I do actually, and I am not one to be silent Adhemar. You might want to keep one eye open when you sleep" I say standing from my seat and leaving him with the threat and going across the hall and leaning against a wall as everyone else follows my lead and stands from their seats.

"So what will you have? A Coranto?" the man makes a dance movement "or a Basa Dancer?" he makes another movement and turns to the mumbling crowd "Sir Ulrich?" Adhemar calls from the other table, everyone turns to look at him "why don't you show us all a dance of your country?" he asks "show us a dance of Guilderland" the crowd mumbles in agreement while Will turns to look around at the people, he gaze lands on me and his eyes widen I smirk at him and nod "yes, Guilderland" the man says looking at Will expectantly with curiosity in his voice "uh" Will stutters, my smirk widens as he makes a small hand gesture "uh ,well it's a lot like the uh farendon **(A/N I didn't quite catch what he said in the movie, so work with me) **but with some differences" he stepped forward and proceeded to show everybody the dance, I almost laughed at how awkward he was being until Jocelyn walked up and joined him, that's when the dancing an music really started; though of course I was not included no matter how fun it looked and how much I wanted to join, either way I had no escort to dance with and no men would be available anyways.

_Why is it always me that gets left out of things? _I sigh and lean back on the wall and cross my arms, I found myself singing along with the music with my eyes closed and my head leant back to rest on the wall as I listened to everybody else have fun while I tried to relax but sadly failed. A tap on my shoulder brought me out of my mind; I opened my eyes and saw Will standing in front of me "Emma?" he asks I smile at him "yes Ulrich it is me" I wink at him and he smiles "nice to see you out of your padding" he says "you too" I tell him chuckling "so, are you having fun?" he asks "what do you think, I am leaning against a wall with nobody around me besides yourself and no matter how much I want to dance, I have no escort so no man is going to ask" I chuckle and lean my head back again as the song continues "I'm here" he says "yes but your lady might find it offensive if you are dancing with another woman not her" I say looking at him pointedly and the looking around the room to spot my sister watching from across the room "thought so. She is watching you know. Will, will you please go and make sure she doesn't get out of hand, keep your lady company. Just leave me, her lowly sister, here in pieces" I say to him while still watching the watching Jocelyn, I nod at her as Will gives up and walks over _always her_ I think watching him walk away.

When the night was over I trudged down the road as the others still danced "always leave it to me to walk away with nobody at my side, I swear I'll become an old hag rather than get married to a man. Unless my father finds me and sets up a marriage" I sigh and wrap my shawl tighter around myself as I shiver at the wind's chill "why?" I ask looking up to the heavens "why is it always me?" I ask shaking my head when it starts to rain "why me?" I mutter letting the droplets of water slowly soak me as I continue trudging to my tent.


	3. Chapter 2

Chapter 2 - Of Jousts and Embarrassments

The next few days we are traveling along side will and his gang to Lagny-sur-Marne. Once we arrive we set up our tents and put on our armor, of course Will and his group have no idea that I am competing in the joust and I plan to keep it that way until the end of it all "are you ready Emma?" Adelaide asks from outside my tent "yes I am Adelaide, I am just thinking about things" I say sighing "well" she says entering the tent "you have to face William, Colville ended up being The Black Prince Edward so he is not competing any longer" she says "I would have joust him no matter his rank" I say "well I figured you wouldn't so" she drifts off "you told them that I wouldn't face a member of the royal family?" I ask "precisely Emma" she tells me "sorry" "it is alright Adelaide, just get the horse ready, I have a feeling Will is going to win no matter if he knocks me off my horse or not, which he isn't going to do anyways" I say chuckling as I stand and put on my helmet.

Jousting is a scary sport, you have to make sure that you don't fall off your horse and that you at least break your lance on the torso of your opponent. I mounted Chancy and positioned myself comfortably as Wulfric introduced me "And here he is Sir Emmery Lovell!" he roared to the crowed, I looked to Will and his group and saw that they were looking at me like I was crazy again, I nodded at them and grabbed my lance, the flag was waved and I prodded Chancy in the sides with the heels, he galloped forward at a record pace; Will was a little slower but he looked determined all the same, I winked at him as he hesitated to hit me, I lunged my lance forward as he did the same, his lance smashed against my torso very hard and mine did the same to him, gripping my thighs I stayed on my horse as he galloped to the other side.

"The winner of the mounted joust and tournament champion, Ulrich von Leichtenstein" the announcer gave Will his trophy as the crowd cheered as well as myself, Will walked off talking to his group as I walked in front of them looking at my gloved hands but not in shame but a sort of embarrassment because of what I realized during and after that joust. My sister walked up to William on the crowd side of the arena and began talking to him about the Banquet this evening but I wasn't listening, I was caught in my thoughts up until I heard my name mentioned, well my tournament name "Sir Emmery Lovell?" my sisters voice shook my out of my trance "yes?" I asked lowering my voice a few keys "you remind me of someone, do I know you? And are we related? We do have the same last name" she says "what is your name, milady?" I ask becoming as gentlemanly as possible "Jocelyn Lovell" she says

"Your name does not sound familiar and you do not look so either, I do believe we are related but perhaps we do not know each other" I say continuing my charade as I hear William fuming about something or other behind me "you remind me of my sister" she says making me stop "a-and who is that milady?" I ask stuttering "Emma Lovell" she says "ah" I say continuing to walk "I believe that my family helped her get out of a rough patch last year, she was travelling around and she needed shelter and food" I say "really, how was she?" Jocelyn asks "good, she was good. She has been visiting a lot since then, something about us being related" I say "did she mention me?" Jocelyn asks "no, or your name would be familiar. But she did mention her family in the Cheapside and how they took her in when the Lovell's dropped her to the streets when she was 8" I say "mother and father said she ran away" I hear Jocelyn mutter, stopping in my tracks I turn to her and put my hands on the beam separating us.

"Milady Jocelyn, if your parents told you that she ran away then it was a lie, my friend Emma Lovell or as she now goes by, Emma Campion loved you and your parents and she still does. I do not believe that she would run away from a family she loved no matter how poorly they treated her, in fact she gave me a necklace to give to you if I ever saw you" I frowned and took off my gloves, I reached behind my head and unclipped the necklace before pulling it out from underneath my shirt and holding it in front of her, she gasped "that is the one thing she took when she left" she muttered "listen Jocelyn" I say struggling to keep up my charade "she did not leave you, do not believe that rubbish, she did not choose to leave, she was forced to, your parents kicked her out and left her in the Cheapside where a more caring family took her in and loved and cared for her" a tear ran down my cheek and I noticed that Will and his group were staring at me with their mouths open "now take the ruddy necklace and I'll be off" I say, she cupped her hands under the necklace and I dropped in her palms before walking briskly away not bothering to say goodbye to my friends.

Next we headed off to Bordeaux where I would not be competing at all, just watching while Will jousted. I ignored them but still went with them to their conjoined tent when Will finished Jousting, my group headed back to our tent while I did so. "Geoff, I need to write a letter" Will said holding a rose "Dear Jocelyn…No my dearest Jocelyn" "better" Geoff said writing it down "uh, I miss you" Geoff and I wince "Hold, uh was that wrong?" Will asks "Um, er, uh it-it's your funeral I-I mean letter" Geoffrey stutters "Say something about her breasts" Wat suggests "Yeah, you miss her breasts" Roland agrees, I scoff quietly "Her… breasts?" Will asks "Ye... yes, you... you could, umm... umm... but I... I would tend to look above her breasts, William" Geoffrey says "Well I... I miss her throat?" Will tests "Uh, still higher really, toward the heavens" Geoffrey says "The moon at least, her breasts still are not that impressive" I say chuckling "the moon?" Will says "the moon" he twirls the rose in his hands, he brings it up to his face and smells the rose as he turns around "it is strange to think, I haven't seen you since a month…I have seen the new moon, but not you. I have seen sunsets and sun rises, but nothing of your beautiful face" he says looking off dreamily

"That's very good William" Geoff says after writing it down "I used to know this girl once who….well she broke my heart but I used to say that The pieces of my broken heart are so small that they could be passed through the eye of a needle" Roland says Geoff writes that down too "I knew a girl too" Wat says "she used to cook for the duke of York…I miss her like the sun misses the flower" as that Wat begins to cry "I've heard that one" I say rubbing Wat on his back comfortingly "Geoff, write this: I miss you like the sun misses the flower; like the sun misses the flower in the depths of winter. Instead of beauty to direct its light to, the heart hardens like the frozen world your absence has banished me to" I say smiling sadly at my own memory of where I heard that the first time when my mother was reading a letter from my father when he was traveling before she died "I next compete in the city of Paris, I will find it empty and in the winter if you are not there" Will says adding another part to the letter

"I like it, and now to finish it" Geoff says writing this all down on the parchment before looking to Kate the blacksmith "With hope" she says "love should end with hope..My husband, God rest him, told me something I'll never forget: Hope guides me, that is what gets me through the day and especially the night. The hope that after you're gone from my sight, it will not be the last time that I look upon you" Kate says looking off into the depths of her mind "and finish it with, with all the love that I poses, William" Will says smiling down at us and fiddling with the rose "you mean Ulrich" Geoff says writing down what we all said Will's heartwarming smile dissipates and I quickly cover up "write down what he said but not with his name try, I remain yours, the knight of your heart" I say "I like that" Geoff says "nice ending Emma" "thank you, I've seen enough love letters in my life so far that I know a good way to end one" I say chuckling sadly as Geoff rolls the letter and ties it with ribbon "now, Emma and Wat you can deliver it. Ask her about giving me something in return" Will says passing the rolled letter to me and Wat "no problem, Will, wish us luck" I say grabbing the letter and Wat's hand and dragging him off to the horses.

A long while later Wat and I reach where Jocelyn is staying. I dismount my horse and Wat follows suit and follows me to her room; when we get there she is sitting on a cushion on a chair with her maid beside her "excuse me milady?" I say bowing politely at her "my lord wanted us to give you a letter" Wat says "I shall go milady" her maid says, stepping out of the room. I give Jocelyn the letter and she begins to read it aloud "My dearest Jocelyn, It is strange to think, I haven't seen you since a month. I have seen the new moon, but not you. I have seen sunsets and sunrises, but nothing of your beautiful face. The pieces of my broken heart are so small that they could be passed through the eye of a needle." She pauses "he speaks as though I had died" she comments "yes madam he dies as well" Wat says as she continues to read the letter while pacing around the room "I miss you like the sun misses the flower; like the sun misses the flower in the depths of winter. Instead of beauty to direct its light to, the heart hardens like the frozen world your absence has banished me to" she drops her left her to her side as she looks over the letter and somewhere else before she drops the other arm.

Jocelyn sighs and lifts the letter up again and reads "I next compete in the city of Paris, I will find it empty and in the winter if you are not there. Hope guides me, that is what gets me through the day and especially the night. The hope that after you're gone from my sight, it will not be the last time that I look upon you" her voice cracks and a tear slides down the side of her face Wat sniffs and wipes his eyes with a hankie and Jocelyn looks over at him and I, Wat hands her to hankie and she wipes her eyes, she gives the hankie back and begins reading again "with all the love that I poses, I remain yours, the knight of your heart" she rolls the letter back up and puts the side onto her lips "my-my master hoped you might have something to sent him in return" Wat says she turns and smiles at him and I "give him this for me" she walks over to us and looks between us _is she going to do what I think she is going to do?_ I ask myself as she decides on me _if she is she is probably choosing me to make the awkwardness less because we are related_ I think as she leans in and kisses my lips "you want me to give that to Sir Ulrich?" I ask flushing a little and hoping that she thinks that it's from her not the thought of kissing Will like it really is, she nods and calls her maid back in "have a safe trip back, I'll see you in Paris" she says as Wat drags me out of the room "you were just kissed by your sister. And now you have to kiss William" Wat says looking at me "yes I know, that was very weird for me" I say "and it will be even more weird when I have to kiss Will" I say mounting Chancy and beginning the ride to Paris.

When we get there Wat whoops and dismounts "Wat" Will grins "Emmery" he grins wider and I smile back "Wat, Emmery tell me, did you see her? Did she read the letter?" he asks grinning even wider and looking at Wat and I urgently "yes" Wat says "and Yes" I add Will's smile is now turned into a small pout waiting for us to continue "and?" he grins again with more urgency "uh" Wat says pretending to wince "she-she's coming to Paris!" he exclaims "ah" Will laughs with Wat "well did she give you anything for me in return? Did she" he calms down a bit more at the face I was making as Wat looked at me "did she give you a letter? Or a token" Will asks "did she give me a token?" Will grins at us "well" I mumble "she did" Will nods still smiling brightly "Emmery" Wat says as I look at the ground, Will looks over at me "Well what is it Em? Come on give it to me" Will begs walking up to me, I look up at him through my eye lashes as he pouts again _God I can't take this_ I say looking around to see if people are watching so it doesn't look too bad while biting my bottom lip, I sigh when nobody is and wring my hands and kiss him quickly on the lips with my hands slightly on his face before looking down again and taking a step back "yes" Will cries after looking at me with a confused look on his face, he goes around cheering as I continue to look at the ground to cover up the fact that my face is beet red in embarrassment and realization that my last inquiry was correct _God I can't believe I like him_ I sigh and walk silently to my groups set up tent.

I flop down on my bed onto my stomach with my hand covering my face _Why me? Why can't this happen to someone else?_ I ask myself _I mean he's in love with my __**sister.**__ Why can't someone else besides me fall for him when my sister obviously loves him back? Why God? Why do you do this to me?_ I shake my head and change into a pair of baggy pants and shirt and I unravel my breasts "god that is a relief" I sigh as I am free to move my torso more freely, I fold the cloth and climb into my bed so I can get lots of rest to watch tomorrows joust.


	4. Chapter 3

Chapter 3 - Of Love, Home, Family and Sadness

At the arena the next day Will road up to the barrier and stopped rather than charging forward like his opponent _What the hell is he doing?_ I ask myself when he gets hit and still doesn't move. This charade continues until the break, I jump over the railing that separates the arena from the crowd and march over to Will and the rest "what the hell was that?" I ask when I see them "Jocelyn wants Ulrich to lose to prove his love to her" Roland says shaking his head "are you mad?" I ask Will _Mad in love maybe_ I think while Christina, Jocelyn's Maid, enters the tent "milady sends this message" she says "she says that if you love her-" "look, I know I know, I must lose. Is she not watching, huh?" Will says, interrupting Christina, she smiles "she says that if you love her you will not lose another match, she says that is you love her you will win this tournament" she says, everyone looks at Will and he just sets his jaw and sighs. Will won the tournament like his lady Jocelyn requested and I was just grateful that he wasn't even more hurt.

The night for me was silent and peaceful and the morning was long and tiring because we were headed to the docks to head to London for the World championships. At the docks we boarded the first thing we saw and headed off "how long since any of you been back?" Geoff asks walking up to us "I've only been gone six months" "two years for me" Kate says "three from my eyes" Wat says "four years" I say "five" Roland says "five long years" "William?" Geoff asks Will who is staring off into the mist "twelve" Will breaths out harshly "twelve years" he continues staring and gets a far off look in his eyes _must be having a flashback or sorts_ I think. Just as William's eyes focus again Roland's eyes widen and his head perks up "London" he mutters, the rest of us look to where he is looking and see that he was right, London was just ahead, _Home sweet home_ I think smiling brightly as I think of my family and the sun begins to rise.

"Please say hello to your sister Emma, be yourself at a tournament for once" Adelaide begs as she gestures to the dress on my bed "fine, I will sit with her" I say grabbing the dress. "See" Adelaide said once she was done darkening my lips "like a charm, you're a girl again" she chuckles "yeah, now I guess it's time to say hello to my dear sister huh?" I say chuckling along with her "go on then" she says shooing me out the tent flaps, standing right there is Adhemar "oh, it's you maiden, what did the other woman mean by: 'you are a girl again'?" he asks _nosey_ I think "well a little while ago my little brother cut most of my hair off, this is merely a piece of another's hair, it is not my own" I say lying through my teeth "oh, do you know Sir Emmery Lovell and his group?" he asks "yes I do, he is my cousin and I met Adelaide, his blacksmith the last time I saw him" I say smiling fakely, but he didn't know that "oh, so who is this sister of yours?" he asks _he really likes questions_ I think "Jocelyn Lovell" I say "oh really?" he asks looking at me in surprise "Emma Lovell at your service Count Adhemar" I say nodding my head and walking past him towards the stadium, he begins walking beside me and I try to cover up my annoyance "I never knew she had siblings" he states "well, our parents did kick me to Cheapside when I was 8 years old" I say not knowing why I was telling him "oh really. Why?" "they only wanted one child so when I was born 3 minutes after her they gave her everything and me nothing before throwing me out like trash to the Cheapside" I say not looking at him "who were you raised by?" he asks disgust in his voice as he tried not to brush against me "peasant folk, a real kind family. I took their last name, Campion" I say walking into the arena "this is where I bit you adieu Sir Adhemar, good luck with the tournament" I say walking to the royal stands.

"Name" a man says blocking my path "Emma Lovell" I say "lady Jocelyn's long lost sister?" he asks I nod "it's me Emma, Cameron, boy you grew up. What happened to you back then?" he asks "Cameron?" I ask raising my eyebrow he nods ecstatically "I was kicked to the Cheapside like trash, that's what" I say "my parents only wanted Jocelyn, now if you excuse me Cameron I would like to see her" I say looking up at him hopefully "no problem Emma" he says smiling at me "thank you Cameron" I say walking up to sit with Jocelyn "how are you sister dear?" I ask her sitting in the seat next to her "Emma?" she asks turning to me in shock "yes, it is me Jocelyn" I say "I haven't seen you for so long, is what Sir Emmery said true?" she asks "oh he found you did he?" I ask "yes he did" she says "yes it is true" I tell her "would you like your necklace back?" she asks "please" I say smiling "here" she takes the necklace out of her bag and puts it around my neck "so you and Sir Ulrich huh?" I say smiling cheekily at her while bouncing my left eyebrow "yes" she mumbles blushing at the statement "well, I wish you luck" I say smiling and turning my attention to the arena as the joust starts.

The first part of the world championships went well and Will made it to the next part "would you like to have a little girl time in my tent?" Jocelyn asks "no thank you Jocelyn. Tomorrow perhaps" I say standing from my seat "have a nice evening" I tell her walking down the steps and to my tent to change into something more movable so I can speak to Will. I get into a baggy shirt (with my breasts wrapped down again) a pair of pants with leather riders over them and a brown jacket over my shirt for warmth. I run to Will's tent and see him mounting his horse "hello Will, well done getting into the next part" I say "thank you Em" he says "no problem you want to take a ride through Cheapside with me?" he asks "it's starting to rain" I point out as rain begins to fall "so" he laughs "touché" I say chuckling, I whistle sharply and wait a few seconds as Chancy gallops around the corner "hey boy" I say patting his side and mounting him "neat trick" Will says "thank you, now let's get going I want to see if my family is still there as much as you do Will" I say chuckling as he sticks his tongue out to catch the rain in his mouth.

It was raining full out now and Will and I were still on horseback in the Cheapside, drenched. Will was still trying to catch rain in his mouth and hitting random dangling things, he stopped in front of a little girl playing with a lance "hello there" he said leaning towards her, she looked up at him and smiled before looking back at her toy as Will waved, her little eyes widened and she looked up at Will "your- your Sir Ulrich von Leichtenstein" she says to him he nods "yes" "you're my favourite knight" she says smiling up at him "when we joust" she jabs the miniature lance forwards "I always say I'm you" she says putting the lance back on her lap Will smiles his heartwarming smile at her and I sigh lightly, shaking my head. "But what are you doing in Cheapside, and your friend too? There's no parade today" she asks. Will shakes his head and looks around for people "can you keep a secret?" he asks her leaning forward again, she nods ecstatically he gives her a look with narrowed eyes and dismounts his horse "ah" he says putting his hand up and feeling the rain.

_He really loves rain doesn't he?_ I chuckle and join the two into the small ledge where it's dry "I was born in Cheapside, in that house over there" he says pointing to a house "Really? Sir Ulrich?" she asks "truly" he says "I only live just there" the girl says pointing to the house across from it "well how old are you?" Will asks looking to where she pointed "nine and one half" she says "nine and one half?" Will asks playfully the girl nods "I wonder if you remember a man, though he may have died before you were born, he was as tall as a knight, his name was John Thatcher" Will says indicating height with his hand _his father_ I smile "of course I remember him" she says "you do?" Will asks in shock "well yeah, he lives there still" she says Will looks at her still shocked with his mouth open adorably _Stop it_ I tell myself _stay in character, you are a man not a woman right now_ I think while shaking my head at myself "sometimes we see him sitting at the window" the girl says "but no one knows why" she says shaking her head "what do you mean" I ask "he's blind sir" she says sadly looking into her lap Will sighs and stands up "excuse us now" he says taking the horses reins and pulling him to his old house "thank you miss" I say taking Chancy's reins and following William to the house.

William walks slowly up the stairs and I follow behind him slowly, when we reach the top we see Will's father weaving a net of some sort Will walked slowly towards the room and he finally made a noise by putting his hands on the frame of the door "s-someone there?" John asks looking in the direction of the door Will says nothing but fidgets with the frame "well if you're here for the net I haven't finished yet, come back tomorrow" he says continuing to weave the net "who are you?" he asks looking in Will's direction as I step up beside him and step on a creaking floorboard "A knight" Will says "two actually" I mumble "my name is Ulrich" Will says ignoring my mumble but I was sure that John heard it "Ulrich" John chuckles "I hear that name being chanted from the stadium" he says.

"What business have you here?" "I have word, master Thatcher, word of your son" Will says "of my William" John says dropping the weaving needle and looking at us fully, well as fully as a blind man can "come in sirs" he says gesturing us inside the room Will and I walk in slowly and I walk to the side to let them have their moment "what word" John says putting his hands on his stomach and rubbing his left thumb on his hand "does he live?" he asks frowning slightly "aye he lives" Wills says breathily "he is very well" Will says as his father nearly cries in happiness "he wanted you to know that he changed his stars after all" Will says his father does infact begin to cry slightly "And-and has he followed his feet?" he asks _he knows it is Will_ I think smiling brightly as John stands up and steps forward "has he found his way home at last?" he asks "yes" Will breaths nodding even though John can't see it John starts stepping forward and reaching out for Will, Will sighs happily and takes his father's hand and guides it to his face "father" he says laughing sadly yet happily "oh William" John says embracing Will _I wish this would happen with my real father_ I think chuckling sadly as tears welled up in my own eyes "and this is Em-" Will starts to say as he breaks his hug with his father, I nod at him to continue "this is Emma Lovell, father" Will says "didn't you say there were two knight's?" John asks "yes" I say "myself and Will" I chuckle and Johns face scrunches up in confusion "you are pretending to be a man?" he asks "wearing men's clothing?" I laugh "that I am John Thatcher, that I am" I reach out and take the hand that he is holding forward "it's a pleasure to meet you" I say "let's sit shall we?" John asks leading us over to a table with chicken on it.

We laugh as Will talks about Wat and Roland a little while later "I should like to meet this Wat and Roland as well" John says calming down from his laughter "you will father, you will" Will says chuckling "and what of women?" John asks _of course he asks that_ I think chuckling silently "is there a certain one or many?" he asks putting down his piece of chicken Will smiles "there is a certain one" he says as his father takes a drink out of his mug "is it Emma?" he asks gesturing to where I was sitting, generally "no it is not me John, it is my sister" I say "well I shall like to meet her as well" John says "oh but this leak won't do father" Will says chewing on another bite of chicken as he sees dripping water from the ceiling "not in the chamber of a Thatcher" he says John chuckles "for a blind Thatcher it's quite brilliant" he says chewing on his own chicken as Will looks at the dripping water "well a Thatcher I am" Will says "I'll fix it for you" he decides standing up and grabbing a bit of things to patch up the leak and climbing out the window.

"You like him don't you?" John asks taking another bite of chicken "no sir" I say blushing, glad he couldn't see at the moment "that is my sister, sorry" I chuckle slightly "I think I'll just become an old hag and live the rest of my life alone" I say chewing a bite of chicken "I doubt that" he says, I take his hand and guide it to my face so he will know what I look like without having to see "I probably will John" I sigh and he familiarizes himself with my features "no, you are as beautiful as William's mother, she was very beautiful" John says taking my hand in his and squeezing it softly "thank you sir" I say "now tell me about yourself, why pretend to be a man and a knight?" he asks.

"Well, I was born into a noble family but the problem was that I wasn't really wanted there, my parents only wanted one child rather than the twins they received so they took the first born and treated her with care and love and spoilt her with every penny they had, that was my sister. Me on the other hand was the second born, they treated me like I was trash and gave me nothing while Jocelyn, my sister, got everything she could ever wish for, one day on my 8th birthday they just had enough I guess, and they threw me to the Cheapside like I really was trash, a black sheep, a rotting piece of meat" I chuckled sadly, tears welling up in my eyes "and I roamed the streets for a few hours not knowing where exactly I was and I called out my family's names thinking it was a game at first but then I slowly realized that it wasn't and that I really was lost and that they didn't want me, I remember that I sat down on a curb and began to cry then" I smile sadly as a tear made its way down my face.

"I cried for what seemed like hours when it was only minutes that I had been sitting there. A little while later it started to rain and I heard a woman calling out the names of some boys, and the boys she was calling were standing across the street from where I was, watching me not knowing what to do exactly" the tear rolled down my cheek and onto our hands "the woman had grabbed the boys and began to scold them when her eyes had came across me sitting all alone with my face in my hands and my shoulders wracking and shaking with my sobs, the woman called out to me and walked over with the boys trailing behind her 'excuse me' she asked 'were are your parents?' she put her hand on my back and rubbed comfortingly 'they don't want me anymore, they put me here and left' I think I said 'now I'm all alone' I had looked up at the woman and the boys to see their sympathetic looks 'come here sweetie' the woman said taking me in her arms and giving me a warm hug, she picked me up and brought me to her home where she got me to tell the rest of their family my story, they decided to let me stay with them and I told them my name, they were surprised of course but gave me food, shelter, clothing, and the love I needed and wanted. A year later I took their last name and became a daughter to them, their only daughter, the other kids I grew up with were boys and since my mother figure, the woman who took me in, died a year after I got there, I grew up in a house of boys when I was the only girl. All my life I worked for what I earned rather than got it when I wanted, and I never had a taste for dresses or girly things anyways so I guess I'm different" I say finishing my long emotional story with tears staining my face.

"You've had a very hard life, my dear" John says reaching for me to give him a hug, I did so and leaned my head on his shoulder "I still say you like William" John whispers smiling into my hair "so maybe I do, I can't help it" I admit speaking as quietly as him "I think that it's his eyes and his smile, they are so warm and caring, a girl just can't help but fall, and I fell hard" I chuckle "I sound like a love sick little girl" I whisper shaking my head "I didn't know you had that hard a life" I heard William say from behind me, I pulled away from John to look at him "well I did" I say "should we go now Will?" I ask "or would you like to like to stay longer, either is fine with me I quite like your father, he is very kind" I say "thank you Emma" John says "no problem" I say "could we stay longer" Will asks smiling sheepishly "Yes we could but I have to see my family soon alright?" I ask smiling sheepishly back at him "alright" he says sitting back down and talking to John.

A few hours later Will and I were headed to my families old house "my brothers should be 21 and 23 now" I say "Saul is one of my squires so he is with me all the time but this is the first time to see the rest in a while" I say smiling brightly at Will as he follows behind me. I stop in front of an empty patch of land where my house was before I left 4 years ago "it should be here" I say confused as I look at the space "excuse me sir" I call out at a man walking down the road "but what happened to the house that was here?" I ask him dismounting my horse and pointing to the space "oh, tragic accident, the whole place burnt down in a fire" he says, my mouth drops "was the owner inside" I ask "yes, along with two of his sons, why?" he asks "that was my family" I mutter "Saul? Is that you?" the man asks "no it's not" I say as a tear rolls down my cheek "Emma?" he asks but I don't look up "it's Sir Emmery Lovell actually" I say trudging back to Chancy while sighing sadly "oh" the man says "what happened" Will asks "Fire, they are dead" I say sadly "and I didn't even get to tell them that I changed my path" I say mounting my horse and riding to the tents "they never thought I could" I say to Will who caught up to me and was riding beside me, from there on the ride was a sad heart breaking silence.


	5. Chapter 4

Chapter 4 - Of Guards, Pain and More Sorrow

That night I spent in my tent thinking about the events of the day and reliving my memories in my head, I fell asleep a long while after I returned from the tent thanks to my thoughts. "Emma" I heard "Emma it's time to wake up, your sister is outside the tent" "really?" I ask not opening my eyes "yes she wanted you to dress and come for a walk with her" Adelaide says "she realizes that I will not be Emma right but I'll be Emmery?" I ask "I do now" I hear Jocelyn say after a rustling of tent flaps, I open my eyes "Saul told me of what happened last night" she said "your family" "yeah, it's tragic" I mumble sitting up in the bed and sliding over to the edge "can you help me today Adelaide?" I ask "I'm not feeling completely up to wrapping myself up this morning" "no problem just pick out your clothes and take out some fresh cloth then I will help you" Adelaide says "alright. You can stay Jocelyn" I say to her as she begins to leave the room "alright" she says coming over to sit on the bed as I do as Adelaide told me to, I lifted my shirt over my head and winced a bit as the old bruises were stretched.

Jocelyn gasped "are you alright?" she asks "yes I am, I've dealt with things like this for almost two years now" I say lifting my arms and letting Adelaide wrap up my breasts "why do you have to do this?" Jocelyn asks "because it would be suspicious if Sir Emmery Lovell didn't walk around London when there wasn't anything going on at the time besides the usual hustle and bustle of London mornings" I tell her while pulling on my shirt and pants, I then grabbed the boots from under my bed and slipped them on "those are strange" Jocelyn comments "yes I know, I made them myself. There is extra leather on the bottom for comfort and safety and the boot itself covers all areas on my calves with a soft animal hide, it folds over too" I say folding down the top of the boot before putting it back up on my knee "they're great for horseback riding and they are very comfortable" I say smiling at her "and it laces up in the back" I say lacing the boots up "I call it an over-the-knee riding boot" I smile brighter and stand up showing her the boots fully "I like them" she says "they're different and they look like they can be worn by both male and female so you aren't too out of place looking like you're wearing female shoes" Jocelyn stands up and I offer her my arm "like a gentleman would do, no matter if I am one or not" I say as she grabs my arm.

We spent the next while talking of our lives since we were 8 but sadly we only got up to our 18th birthdays before we were interrupted "excuse me, are you Sir Emmery Lovell?" a official looking man asks "yes I am" I say tentatively looking over at him, he whistles and a dozen more men with shields and axes walk around the corner "what is this?" I ask dropping my arms to my sides "your arrest" the lead man says "arrest her" he says _they've found me out_ I gasp as men grabs my arms and hold my hands behind my back, I look back at a shocked Jocelyn as I am dragged away. "You, Emma Lovell are charged with Death penalty" I was told as they threw me in a small cell with my hands restricted by a large cylindrical piece of wood behind my head with my wrists tied to it, soon after Will was thrown in the cell "why hello William" I say from my spot on the floor "hello Emma, you got found out too aye?" he said "yeah, death penalty for wearing men's clothes, how about you?" I ask "stocks" he says "really, you faked your rank and get put in the stocks and I fake my gender and I get either my head chopped off or hanged? God that's cruel" I say shaking my head as best as I can.

A little bit later I am still leaning against the wall while Will is in the middle of the sun light in the room when Adhemar walks in "he who strives to touch a star" Adhemar starts, walking around to In front of Will "often stumbles at a simple straw" he says bringing a straw up and snapping it _I knew he was behind this_ I think sighing Adhemar walks closer to Will "you have been weighed" he says punching Will in the side, Will makes a sound of pain as he bends over sideways "Hey" I cry out "you have been measured" Adhemar says walking to the other side of Will and backhanding him across the face "leave him alone" I yell struggling to get away from the wall and to stand "and you have been found wanting" Adhemar finishes punching Will again "stop it!" I scream "one loss or another…William" Adhemar ignores me again and makes Will face him by grabbing the branch that holds Will's arms up like mine "in what world could you have ever beaten me?" he asks letting go of the branch Adhemar's lip trembles in hatred and he punches Will again this time hard enough to bring him to his knees "in this world Adhemar, in this world" I say as he turns to leave "oh hello Emma" he says emphasizing on my name and kicking my feet out from under me once I finally stand up from the floor "damned man" I curse as I struggle to stand again after he leaves.

"Are you okay Will?" I ask him "he's right" Will mumbles "he's right" he speaks louder "in what world can I ever beat him" he says "no" I yell standing up, Will looks up at me with a defeated look on his face "no, don't say that. Never say that, it's this world that you can beat him" I finally break my fearless façade and begin to weep "this is your big shot Will; you have changed your stars. The only reason Adhemar did this was because he knew he could never beat you in a jousting match. He just found out about me along the way. It's a mad world Will, yes, but you are unbeatable; you will get out of this and knock him off his horse, he will look up at you from the flat of his back and you will repeat what he said to you in here back to him as he does so. Do not give up Will, never give up, ever. It's your turn to change fate, you're turn to turn the tables and your turn to win this tournament" I yell, tears sliding down my cheeks "what about you?" Will asks "I'll be cheering for you from the heavens Will, there is no way I'll get out of my sentence, not a chance. Unless the prince orders it himself, I cannot go past this barrier that I have encountered, this is my journeys end Will" I say kneeling beside him "this is my end" I say leaning on his shoulder "I wish you luck with the tournament. I know you will win" I laugh and smile at him sadly "do you mind if I sing? It's not like I'll have the chance to do so later" I chuckle sadly and he nods looking at me with sad eyes _it's definitely his eyes _I think

"Lay down  
Your sweet and weary head  
Night is falling  
You've come to journey's end  
Sleep now  
And dream of the ones who came before  
They are calling  
From across the distant shore

Why do you weep?  
What are these tears upon your face?  
Soon you will see  
All of your fears will pass away  
Safe in my arms  
You're only sleeping

What can you see  
On the horizon?  
Why do the white gulls call?  
Across the sea  
A pale moon rises  
The ships have come to carry you home

And all will turn  
To silver glass  
A light on the water  
All souls pass

Hope fades  
Into the world of night  
Through shadows falling  
Out of memory and time  
Don't say: "We have come now to the end"  
White shores are calling  
You and I will meet again

And you'll be here in my arms  
Just sleeping

What can you see  
On the horizon?  
Why do the white gulls call?  
Across the sea  
A pale moon rises  
The ships have come to carry you home

And all will turn  
To silver glass  
A light on the water  
Grey ships pass  
Into the West"

I stop singing and close my eyes to try and stop the tears but sadly that doesn't work "who were you singing to?" Will asks as I weep on his shoulder "myself" I reply sniffing "that was beautiful, like the sun touching the horizon and the colour of the sky" Will complements I laugh sadly "you and your poetry" I say "thank you Will, that means a lot before someone's last moments" I lean back and smile at him "I hope you have a happy life with Jocelyn" I say "you are truly the best man I've ever met" I say smiling kindly at him and staring into his hazel eyes "thank you" he says "not a problem Will. I say what I mean and I mean what I say and what I say is the truth" I tell him a single tear dropping onto my lap _why do I have to love someone so far out of my reach?_ I ask myself sighing, I look up at Will who is still watching me "I will get you out of this" he promises "you can try Will" I say resting my head on his shoulder again, what I do next I had no control over, I lean up and kiss him briefly on the lips "for comfort William" I say covering my stupid act and I lean on his shoulder again. Sometime later Will is dragged out of the cell and to the stocks while I am left alone "Why do I have to love you William Thatcher" I mumble shaking my head as I watch the cell door waiting for my calling.

A while later I was standing on a platform with people crowded around, I didn't notice there taunts and insults all I saw and heard was the swinging of the rope hanging above me. As I looked at the rope sadly I didn't notice the tears and I didn't notice my friends fighting to get by the guards near me and I didn't notice the people screaming at me, I didn't notice how broken I looked and how I was humming until the rope began to descend towards me. I stopped humming and let the men loop the rope around my neck and tighten it, I began to mouth the words to a song I knew from my childhood and I took a deep breath and waited in bated breath for them to pull the trigger that moved the platform out from underneath me. "Three, two, one" I distantly heard the crowd chanting as my tearstained face "I am broken, broken as shattered glass. Broken will come to pass, pass away. Death, I welcome thee. My loved ones I may miss, but I have suffered this. Broken as the sun passes the moon, broken is where I am, broken is where I'll stay. I'm broken when I am here and now I'm broken enough to think that I'll be okay, that death is kind and will give me mind and let me live" I whisper into the wind "I love you" I whisper quieter as I see William barging his way through the crowed with people in black coats and his group trailing behind him, I smile for the last time and say "you tried William, you tried" as they pull the trigger and the platform falls from under me.


	6. Chapter 5

Chapter 5 - Of saviors and partial endings

I feel the rope tighten around my neck as my body bounces when the rope straightens, but the feeling is only brief because an arrow breaks the ropes middle and I fall to the ground gasping for breath _he did it_ I thought smiling up through the hole in the platform above me and tugging at the rope around my neck. I grab the edge of the hole and pull myself up onto the platform as I hear someone yell "She was supposed to die, what was that for" _I feel so loved_ I think chuckling as I lie back on the platform and smiling contently "listen people of London" a man says with authority in his voice "I say that this woman is to be let go with a fine only, under my law this woman will not be hanged here today, or ever" he says, I sit up and look at the man _Prince Edward whoa_ I think in awe "what she did was noble, she accepted death like an old friend and he let her go free. She doesn't deserve death, if anything she deserves praise for being so brave about her own death and staying calm unlike any other person that suffered the fate she nearly did, she deserves applause" Edward says clapping and looking at me with kind eyes, my friends begin to clap with him and soon so does the crowd, my friends are watching me stand and smile at them "Thank you" I say to them when the clapping dies down "you are very welcome Miss Lovell" Edward says "I told you that you would live" I hear William say behind me "thank you the most Will" I say turning around and giving him a big hug with my arms around his neck and my head on his shoulder "no problem Emma" Will says hugging me back "I really thought my death was right then and there" I whisper to him "I know" he says pulling back "I got knighted" he says smiling at me with kind hazel eyes "really?" I ask he nods "congratulations" I say "you deserve it, now get your arse to that stadium and joust your best, I want to see Adhemar looking up at you from the flat of his back" I say pushing him towards the stadium "alright, alright" he says running off.

At the tournament I am sitting with Christina waiting on Jocelyn, I am wearing a shirt and pants and my hair is down. Adhemar is currently being introduced and I am looking around for Jocelyn _She should be here by now_ I think, Will looks up here for Jocelyn and Christina shrugs while I shake my head in disbelief _unbelievable_ I think sighing as the joust begins; Will and Adhemar are charging at one another as fast as they can, "come on Will" I mumble as Adhemar thrusts the lance forwards as Will does the same, Adhemar's lance breaks through Will's armor and looks like it pierced the skin underneath "What?" I exclaim standing from my seat as I see the lance piece protruding from the right side of Will's armor, I wince as Roland pulls the lance piece out _he's tipped it_ I realize as I see the end of the lance piece even from here I could tell _he can't hold his lance properly now_ I think as Will and Adhemar charge again. Will drops the lance and Adhemar gets another hit to Will's torso I wince again.

Something creaks behind me and I turn to see Jocelyn sitting down with John Thatcher I smile at her "Hello Jocelyn, John" I say "hello" Jocelyn greets "miss. Lovell?" John asks "yes it's me John" I say smiling sweetly even though he cannot see it "nice to hear you again" he says "you too John" I say turning back to the tournament, I feel John put my hand on his arm and I comply and leave it there, I see Will riding to his side wincing with his left hand on the wound and I bite my lip nervously _I hope that he'll be okay_ "he'll be alright Emma" John says on my left as if he read my thoughts "I hope so" I tell him. Kate, Will's blacksmith takes his torso padding off and I see that he is panting in pain, I bite my lip harder, shortly after she takes it off I notice that she doesn't put it back on "whatever you are doing, Will" I shake my head "I hope to God that you'll be alright" I whisper to myself quietly so nobody but myself could hear, as I was whispering to myself I missed Will's preparation for the round and my focus returned when Geoff shouted "Good People" and climbed onto the rail in front of us, I look up at him and smile I guess he sees from the corner of his eye because he turns slightly and smiles back "I missed my introduction" he says pausing for the crowds cheers to die down "but please" he starts letting go of the post beside him and talking a few steps forward on the rail "please I pray you hear it now" he reaches the other post and places his hand onto its' side "for I would lay rest the grace in my time, then speak plainly. Days like these are far too rare to cheapen with heavy-handed words, and so I'm afraid without any ado what so ever" he says moving back and forth between the two posts as he speaks "s'cuse me my lord" he says stepping onto the arm rests between the prince and his lover "here he is, one of your own, born a stone's throw from this very stadium and here before you now, the son of John Thatcher, Sir William Thatcher" He yells to the audience gesturing to the crowd and John beside me as he spoke of them.

The crowd bursts out in loud cheers and whistles, John moves as he turns red in the face as proud, happy tears roll down his cheeks and we all clap as loud as we can. Geoff mumbles something I cannot hear as he gets down from where he is standing and with a nod in my direction, sets towards Will and his 'team'; Adhemar speeds off first and a few seconds later Will takes his own steed and gallops down toward Adhemar as he came towards him, Will lets out a loud yell of his name before his lance came in contact with Adhemar's torso, slowly Adhemar falls off his steed and lands on his front, winded. "Yes!" I hear the prince yell before leaning over and kissing his lover soundly "he won, he won" my sister says to John over the crowd as I keep my excitement inside and smile brightly at Will and his 'team' while clapping as loud as I can with the crowd around me, to my left John leans his head back and closes his eyes smiling, down on the arena Will and his team are celebrating in an excited jumpy manor. I stand and the row stand with me, my sister, her maid and John included, as we cheer our loudest, Jocelyn lets go of John's other arm and runs down to the ground and over to William. Will, seeing this he takes off his gloves after letting go of Wat and jumps over the barrier and runs towards her and they embrace in a kiss as if nobody was watching, My smile falters and I let go of John's arm "excuse me" I tell Jocelyn's maid and John as I walk off the noble platform and out of the stadium, hoping nobody saw as my eyes began to sting.

A while later I could hear people walking back to their tents and talking about how fantastic the tournament was, my sad tears had cleared up a while ago and I was left lying on my bed with my head on the stiff pillow. "Hello" I heard Geoff's voice say with a light knock on the wood of the tent "are you alright, I saw you walk briskly out of the arena" he says with a rustle letting me know her entered the tent "you seemed upset" he adds "you saw that?" I ask my voice muffled by the pillow "yes, I think I was the only one besides Jocelyn's maid" he says "I'm glad" I mumble "so are you alright?" He asks, I feel the bed move as he sat down on the edge "no" I say sadness evident in the single word, Geoff was silent for a minute "you love him don't you?" he asks "sadly" I admit turning my head to look at him "why him though, he already loves another and she loves him back, why do I have to love someone so far out of my reach?" I ask "why me?" I mutter "love appears in the strangest places" Geoff says "and in the strangest ways" "thank you Geoff, that makes me feel a little better" I say sitting up and sitting beside him "but that doesn't change the fact that I'll probably become a hag and live the rest of my life alone" I sigh "William doesn't have to be your only love" Geoff reasons "I know. But who would want me?" I ask gesturing to myself "a woman who pretended to be a man and a knight, no matter what my birth rights are, I'll be a lonesome hag for the rest of my life" I fiddle with my fingers as I looked down at my lap where they rested "you won't, I guarantee it" Geoff says "have a nice night" he says patting my leg and leaving the tent, leaving me to my thoughts.


	7. Chapter 6

Chapter 6 - The End

That night I made my final decision.  
I decided that I would not want to ruin something that made everyone happy. Well, everyone but me.

It was very late as I put the last of my things in my saddle bag, I mounted Chancy and took one last look at the town of London, with a heavy heart I kicked Chancy's sides and tightly gripped the reins as he galloped off towards the docks.

**_Third Person_**

As the group made their way back to their tent they continued to celebrate their victory. But as they got to their tent they noticed that a candle was lit "It must be Emma" Wat said, happily, William grinned as he picked up his pace but when he walked into the tent his grin fell. "What is the m-?" Geoff began but he cut himself off as he saw the piece of folded paper propped up on the burning candle, Will rushed to the table and picked up the paper, its front was marked by three words 'To _My Friends'_ , William opened the note and read it slowly, a sad look crossing his features as he reached the end. He looked back at his friends and took a breath before rushing to Emma's tent.

Wat, Roland, Kate and Geoff slowly walked toward the note, worried looks on their faces.

As Will reached the tent he noticed that only Adelaide, Saul, Gerald, and Wulfric stood inside, all looking so very sad.

Geoff slowly picked up the letter with trembling hands.

Will rushed past the quartet with urgency, running into the practically bare room where Emma had slept.

"_Dearest friends_"

Will walked over to the made bed, he sat down and looked at his hands.

"_I am so very sorry, but I could not continue_"

In the other room William heard the cries of the four people he'd never got to know.

"_I have decided to leave. Some of you know why_"

As William looked around in the dark of the room he saw something resting on the pillow.

"_Do not worry about me, I am perfectly fine, wherever I am._"

Will stood from the bed and walked over to the top of the bed.

"_I just could not handle it, but I did not want to fight._"

It was a small piece of paper with writing on its face.

"_This was my choice. Don't try to find me._"

'_To Will'_ it read.  
"_Goodbye_"

Will picked up the paper and turned it over.  
'_I love you and I am sorry._'


	8. Authors Note - End

I'm not going to write any more of this story, my ideas for anything more than what I wrote have long faded.

I hope you enjoyed it!


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